Last evening I watched Fox's TV show "Hell's Kitchen". It seems to me that Chef Ramsay is angrier every season. The level of his anger, and of the contestants, appears to base itself on an exceptionally high standard, which is, and is not, being met by the contestants. They are yelled at, called stupid cow, or somesuch very close to that. I am stunned at the level of shame and disappointment they carry, and with the others the level of ego that sees everyone else as beneath them.
Gosh, if we just had that sense of dismay over how we are treating the earth, how women and children are being abused and exploited, how nations are tearing away at their own people, and peoples of other nations......well, maybe some changes for the better would take place. But to have a fit over unblanched green beans and undercooked pasta made me realize how vain it all is. The well-to-do are treated like priests and goddesses and they act as though they are; yet, in two days they poop and pee out what they had for that dinner; but the pain given to the cooks lasts much, much longer.
All I can see is how utterly thankful the homeless and hungry people in communities across this nation and around this world would be if they could eat undercooked risotto, overcooked scallops, not-quite-done green beans, sticky pasta, and under-cooked anything else. People are starving for some morsel of food!! Think about that when you watch Hell's Kitchen.
If I could live my life over again I would get a culinary degree and make beautiful things. But it serves no useful purpose to be abusive or allow oneself to be abused. It's amazing and saddening to me that people will rise to the occasion only when they're screamed at, called names, and threatened!! Isn't it frightening to think that we have come to this? - that the ONLY way people will rise and excel is through humiliation???
Most of us know, or think we know, what BDSM means. I thought I did until I researched it online. Even though it's supposed to be a kind of play-acting with consenting partners, it slips into a bad place many times, and the 'receiver' of the punishment was not ready for the level of "discipline" exacted by the 'actor'. BDSM = being restrained (submitting to bondage), unable to defend yourself. You've trusted the person who restrains you; then you are disciplined by being flogged, whipped; pain is inflicted as punishment; then you are humiliated. There is no relief given. There is much more involved, and I know I've oversimplified this. But the basics are there.
Watch what people do to you in your life, just as in Hell's Kitchen. Who loves to keep you beneath them? Who seems to like 'cracking the whip' at your expense? Who seems to feel the need to punish you, make you answerable for everything you do, misjudges you? Who brings you into feelings of humiliation? - and keeps you in that painful emotional/mental state of constantly trying to please them while attempting to regain some self-respect and balance. It is assumed you are consenting to this. Those people NEVER want to know you, to know what really makes you tick. They don't love you - they just know the words. These people appear so very angry, but in fact, are afraid and have feelings of inferiority. They absolutely must make everyone around them feel misery, less than normal. Deep inside them is someone who CAN'T get out as they will be seen for who they think they are - inferior. Ever try to dish out a compliment to them? - They tend to insult you for it. They talk a good 'humanity', but act like tyrants. It is so very sad.
Cooking is a beautiful, creative act of giving to others - to those you know and even those you don't know. No one NEEDS to abuse, but to motivate in other more positive ways. Inspiring others to become more than they ever thought they could be is much more difficult than screaming them into better performances through inflicting intimidation, humiliation, and fear.
Right on Jacqueline. That guy on "Hell's Kitchen" is way out of bounds. You just do NOT treat people that way.
ReplyDeleteRenée